Kim Jong Un Dictates to Sony

The Interview is a satirical work of fiction that apparently so angered the hermit-like Stalinist North Korean regime that it famously unleashed its crack hacking squad on Sony Pictures.

An astonishingly un-American series of reactions took place throughout the day Wednesday when Pyongyang’s hackers invoked 9/11 to threaten moviegoers. First, Sony said it would let cinemas opt out of showing the movie, and major chains including AMC and Regal announced that they would not screen it.

Later in the day, Sony decided to pull the movie altogether and has no plans ever to release it.

What kind of bullshit is this? We’re letting Stalinist hackers dictate what American moviegoers get to see? North Korea – which made no such complaints against Team America : World Police – is now censoring American motion pictures? Are there any other programs or movies that Pyongyang would like me to not watch? Should Kim Jong Un be on retainer with the MPAA to rate movies as “PA” or “Pyongyang Approved”?

Jeff Simon in the Buffalo News is absolutely wrong. The Interview doesn’t “go too far” – it’s a comedy, for God’s sake. It’s satirical. Who will be the arbiter of what does and doesn’t “go too far”? A Stalinist dictator who inherited his post from daddy and grampa?

When a crazed, heavily armed lunatic shot and killed 12 and injured 70 in an Aurora, Colorado movie theater, the studio didn’t pull “Dark Knight Rises” from American cinemas.

We hear a lot about how diplomacy equals appeasement, which isn’t at all true. Appeasement is appeasement – unilaterally pulling a movie (with no quid pro quo),  succumbing to blackmail and threats is appeasement. North Korea wins because Sony is obviously run by idiots, and next time Kim Jong Un gets a diseased bug up his ass about something in America, he’ll make more threats because, apparently, that sort of shit works. Maybe theaters and studios will just pull any movie that receives a vague and anonymous threat. This Esquire piece is spot on: this is simply idiotic and gutless.

All of this has proven Seth Rogen and James Franco right. They clearly saw, from the beginning, what the monster in North Korea fears most: to be ridiculed. They will no doubt soon be venting their rage against the companies that have blocked and delayed their movie, and their rage will be justified. Everyone is ridiculous except them. That may turn out to be the deepest irony of the Ridiculous War of 2014: that Seth Rogen and James Franco, a couple of Hollywood stars in a gross-out comedy, are the only two people involved in the whole affair who have emerged with their dignity intact.

Remember: North Korea didn’t intimidate anyone into killing this movie:

Propaganda 101

There aren’t a lot of Stalinist dictatorships left in the world, and the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea (DPRK), or North Korea is the weirdest of all. Led now by a Swiss-educated twentysomething, it is effectively a large jail with its own currency, and the world’s only Communist dynasty. 

This week, North Korea sent a satellite into space. For a country that follows long-discredited communist central planning and considers anyone not in the military or the party to be disposable, launching a rocket seems to be hardly a priority. But for all the tea party dummies, this is communism, and this is communist propaganda. It’s a dying art; one that was once practiced throughout the globe.  Clap in unison, comrades for the “Hot Wind of Kim Jong-Un”, the sun of the nation and the lodestar for unification

[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h7N5HJso9e8]

If you want to learn a bit more about the reality of the concentration camps within the national prison that is the DPRK, watch this: 

http://cnettv.cnet.com/av/video/cbsnews/atlantis2/cbsnews_player_embed.swf

Pyongyang Traffic

Here’s something odd I found on a North Korea Flickr group. A person rode around Pyongyang taking picture of buses and trolleys, categorizing the types he found. Here are two incidental finds that I found puzzling, as these vehicles are distinctly American, and we don’t exactly export to the hermit kingdom. 

The first shows a Dodge Ram van, sold until 2003 and replaced by the Mercedes-built Sprinter vans. The second shows a VW Routan, which is a rebadged Chrysler Town & Country minivan. It’s a vehicle that is not sold anywhere outside of North America, as the rest of the world is too good for such a cynically awful amalgam of American mediocrity and European badge engineering. My best guess is that they’re either owned by Canadian diplomats, UN services, or some NGO or another. I just think it’s surreal.

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